Assertiveness is generally known as a willingness to speak up.
A more complete definition is that an assertive person has a certainty, a strong belief in him or herself and is willing to validate his or her own truth by speaking up.
World leaders and changers such as Mother Teresa, Mahatma Gandhi and Nelson Mandela are examples of people whose assertiveness was a validation of their heart strength and their internal belief of who they were. Their message resonated with whole communities that were oppressed or incapable of expression, validating their beliefs in the process. Assertiveness can be really beautiful, and immensely powerful, yet not requiring physical strength in any way.
Assertiveness is not aggression. Some may see it that way based on beliefs that it is rude, disrespectful or even insulting to voice an opinion opposite to another’s. However, we don’t have to make others wrong to be entitled to our own opinion.
Assertiveness also recognises freedom and the right of another to disagree. Their disagreement does not lessen the strength of our own conviction. We also do not have to convince the other person for our position to be valid.
Parents often wish their child would speak up and have an opinion. The downfalls of a lack of assertiveness leads to situations like these:
- A willingness to please everyone at the expense of themselves.
- A lack of confidence in approaching social situations
- Lack of friends or romantic relationships
- Inability to form a deeper relationship
- A fear of vulnerability, of exposing self
- A risk of being bullied
- An inability to stand up for someone else being bullied
- Poor performance at interviews
- A fear of standing out
- Weak leadership
The lack of assertiveness in most adults and young usually comes from a fundamental lack of self-esteem. It could be that as a child, their opinion was trampled on, or they were made to feel less because of their opinion. Someone in authority, at times a parent’s words or actions, has caused a child to feel belittled or has been made intentionally or unintentionally wrong for their opinion, effort or result. So, as parents, we must be aware of the power of our language if we are not to suppress our children’s expressions.
Assertiveness and Leadership Sessions and Workshops are available to help build self- esteem, self- worth and self-confidence. These involve addressing:
- Saying No
- Setting limits
- Receiving and giving criticism
- Communicating needs
- Handling conflict
- Receiving compliments
- Giving positive feedback
- Interview and Relationship Success
- Body Language Training
Significant outcomes are usually seen after just one session.
Click on these links to book your success session:
Call Michelle on 0404 481 091 for more information.